Strange Machines

Today we celebrated Father’s Day at Modestos and then went to paint Takashimaya red. Our dear aunt NH called to say she was at the airport with her boys and we sped off to meet them. I told Jack in the car we were going to see his grandaunt and uncles and he was thrilled. It had been 4 months since he saw them and he remembered them very well.

In fact, when they showed up, he walked right up to her, peered at her and said “Gu Puo (grandaunt in Chinese)”. She was so amazed she gave him a big hug. We had dinner at Crystal Jade and he let his young uncles carry and play with him. He even showed off the “car bag” I made for him.

“Car bag,” he proclaimed, and proudly displayed the sling bag hung diagonally around him. “Mama made!” I was so thrilled. It was the first thing he showed everyone at lunch and at the airport today when he met them, right after wishing all the fathers a loud “Happy Father’s Day!”. His Dad and I were so proud of him.

He remembers things very acutely. From the broken car mirror on the silver car at the Forum Toys R Us (now fixed, but he reminds me every time, “not broken”, when we go there) to who bought him what. He remembers all his extended family and even people he met just once and where. It is remarkable. Even the things we don’t review at the end of the day. I would always ask him if he had a great day and what he did today. Still months later he will amaze me by remembering something I barely registered.

At Terminal 3, he weighed himself at an empty check-in counter. He is 12.3kg and 94 cm tall at 25 months, one heck of a runner, bilingual, a competent singer (he sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star to me this morning, out of nowhere), an avid dreamer (he’ll tell me about his dreams - sweet dreams about everyone hugging), a loving and affectionate child (he’ll hug and kiss and tell his loved ones he loves them in English and Chinese), and that amazing memory.

And in other news, a sweet evening with Boy tonight. Ah I love my boys so much.

Today I brought Jack to town, hoping to snag the latest Aranzi Aronzo book Cute Stuff which is the best starter book for anyone who wants to sew their own bags. After the Kino 20% discount, it was $20.02, way cheaper than Amazon! V, whom I met for coffee today, agreed and mirrored my horror that shipping takes one month!

I have to say the Aranzi Aronzo books provide the best starter for any sewing novice with easy to follow step-by-step pictorial examples. It was easy to make Biscuit and Gray from their instructions, with some modifications to make them mine.

Anyway, I joined Etsy, a great site for buying and selling homemade things and have bought 3 sweet stuffed dolls already. Nothing beats homemade, which is why I stopped buying any stuffed animals for Jack since I read about all the damn toxic crap in our toys. And that sparked the interest in making them. So Biscuit and Gray were born.

Bookmark my Etsy page. I’ll be putting up my cloth bags and some small stuffed animals for sale soon.

Meanwhile I love my Singer. It is almost like driving that car simulator today at Best in Taka. Awesome!

Whenever I have to nurse Jack in the middle of the night, I always cop a sniff of his cheeks before I offer him the boob.

Oh the wonderful sweet scent of a baby’s cheek. His breath is like nectar. It lets ooze all the mushy mommy feelings and I gladly lie here next to him till he falls asleep again.

Our sense of smell is probably our most acute. One sniff and it brings us back to a forgotten time and place.

Ah here he’s done. I’m gonna cop another sniff…

To all those who asked, this is Biscuit (white rabbit) and Gray (gray cat), the two 100% cotton cloth dolls I hand sewed for Jack, inspired by the cute dolls by Aranzi Aronzo.

Now, before Biscuit came into our lives, Jack called all rabbits biscuits. I thought it was the cutest thing and interestingly enough, having Biscuit made the distinction between a “biscuit” and “Biscuit” the name.

Biscuit was made from an old 3 cats t-shirt of mine my Mom gave me. The front was stained with breast milk but the back was okay. So I cut it up and Biscuit was born, sometime late April. 28th I think.

Gray came soon after. 2 days if I recall correctly. April 30th. My fave Victoria’s Secret gray top had stretched beyond decency and its soft material made it perfect for a small gray cat. Victoria seemed rather stiff for a cute cat, so I called him Gray instead.

Biscuit’s pose in the picture was inspired by the bats on the last page of The Gruffalo’s Child. They sleep with us every night and Biscuit reads to Jack every night.

Anyhow, Gray needed a bit of surgery today.

I’d been staring at his uneven forehead for a month now and it kept driving me crazy (yes, Sab, my obsession with alignment even extends to live objects, not just webpages).

So this evening, while Jack obsessed about aligning (appeared to be inherited) his cars properly on his Tomy car park, I deftly took out my crafting bag, removed a needle, black thread, and scissors, and promptly gave Gray a lobotomy. Really, I unpicked the stitches under his right cheek, took out his stuffing, turned him inside out, unpicked the stitches attaching his ear to head, and restitched that part.

Jack turned to look at me some five minutes later, rather puzzled, then a little disturbed. I noticed his stare and told him, Momma is repairing Gray’s head. He glanced at poor Gray’s flattened head. Then reached out for Biscuit, his stuffed rabbit, and stealthily put her behind him.

Luckily his Dad was out of his shower and proceeded to distract him by playing with his cars and reading to him. Perhaps tonight he was too alarmed by Gray’s inside out anatomy that he allowed Dad to help Biscuit read his dinosaur book to him in a dreadful falsetto voice.

Gray’s head is now a beautifully aligned symmetry. I can sleep better now.

This morning when we woke, Jack nursed as usual and sweetly asked, “Mama please hold hands”. I held his hand. Once done, he peered into my dozy face and grinned, kissed my cheeks repeatedly and then ran outside to look for his Dad.

We accomplished a lot today. Got a new pair of spectacles, ordered a new bathroom door to replace the broken one, did some market research on sewing machines (I was very awed by the Singer 8280 and the saleslady’s demo).

In the end, we lugged home my brother’s old Singer - actually my grandmother’s - after much convincing (”It’s the second last furniture I have of grandma’s.” “Grandma’s going to live with you soon. Isn’t having grandma herself even better than her furniture?” Pause. “You’re so rude.”).

I spent the latter half of the evening cleaning it (and here’s a link to some step-by-step advice). It is rusty but I rubbed in lemon and salt and hoped for the best. The gears still work and everything is where it should be. I spent a moment thinking of my grandma sitting by her machine with all the chalk, thread, and needles in the drawers.

I confess still being tempted by the 8280, its reputation only slightly marred by some jamming issues. Duds, some of them? The saleslady May said they’re all assembled in China now, although the parts are made in Brazil. I’ve been lucky so far with the Nokia phones. But let me run a couple of projects on the old Singer first. But it would be nice to have a machine ready to go…

Since it sells on Ebay for about slightly more than the list price including shipping (over US$100 - ouch), I might just get it here if I want it. Okay, I want it, but for now, I don’t need it.

Meanwhile, I’m planning to make this lovely stuffed tomato dish (with organic spinach, diced carrots, raisins, black beans, garlic, some herbs) for dinner tomorrow. It will be a nice change from the usual pasta+fish combo. That and the wrinkled yellow capsicum that is now 1 week old in my fridge.

My sweet baby turned 2 this week. On his birthday morning I woke up to see his beaming face above mine and he proclaimed, happy birthday out there.

Dad came by and we went to get his chocolate cake, as requested, and his fave berry yogurt. We had lunch at my sister’s where he happily played with his two cousins Amber and Ethan and later followed Dad and I to buy sushi for dinner.

In the evening, we had a wonderful family party at my parents’ home with lots of yummy food and when we sang happy birthday, he grinned and both of us blew out the 2 candles.

He had such a perfect birthday.

I suspect I am pregnant (or the flu virus I have is particularly virulent).

Here’s why:

* I have never had 3 acne pimples on my face at the same time since I was born. One at a time. 2 max, but never ever 3. Not in the same week and not at the same time.

* I just got seriously nauseous playing Elder Scrolls: Morrowind. This from a woman who spent the better half of 2005 playing WoW almost 24/7 (excluding working and sleeping hours of course).

* Lousy appetite. Change in eating habits. Weird cravings. Bought apple baked ham the first time in about a year, devoured it in one go, and then felt ill. No more red meat. Feel nauseous just thinking about it.

* Increased discharge.

* Funny abdominal cramps today.

* Insomnia (but could be due to pseudo ephedrine).

* Jack’s been making some noise about having a sibling (okay, he has for a while but I remember he did so around ovulation time).

* A feeling that something is slightly off-kilter.

Hmm… letcha know in a week or so.

In a few days, my sweet son will be 2. Looking back, he’s achieved so much.

Today he mastered 3-puzzle jigsaws. At the last United Square toy fair, I bought him a wooden box full of lovely animal jigsaws. Only today did he bring it out to play and in a blink, he mastered them all.

His vocabulary is increasing exponentially. Today he learnt the phrase “hold the bar” (while coming down stairs). He can easily say complete sentences by himself, but even with new phrases, I don’t need to say 2-3 words at a time. He can copy half sentences after hearing them once.

It has been frequently commented that he is thin. Let’s just say it is genetic and from my side of the family. With double dominant thin genes from his maternal grandparents, it is a slam dunk. He grows proportionally. Today his Dryper XL seems to be getting tighter so I know he is growing. Just a few months ago he was wearing L!

He is 90th percentile for his age group in terms of height at 88-90cm. At 12kg he is 50th percentile for his weight.

He eats all day and I feed him healthy organic fruit and vegetables. He loves blueberries and can say hello to the nice Aunty Nancy at Why Yogurt over in Great World City there, tell her his favourite 3 berries, and remind me that the blue and pink cups that used to be displayed in the glass case are gone.

He loves playing with his cars, puzzles, reading his books, and most sweetly, is most fond of the stuffed cotton rabbit and cat I made him. He hugs them and tells everyone, “Mama made”.

At the toy store, he is happy to just browse and not buy, a habit formed from early days of “looking trips” and the very rare “buying trip”. He is happy with the toys he has at home. Even for his birthday, he just wants another of his favourite car. I was so proud.

He is loving and affectionate, showing kisses and hugs to his grandma, grandpa, mom, and dad. He is very sociable, and readily waves hello and goodbye to people we meet, lending a smile to those he favours.

He greets me every morning with a grin, saying “Good Morning!” and then “Wake up, Mama!” What a fabulous way to wake up.

It has been a happy, sleepy, and wonderful 2 years with this joyful, sweet, delightful little boy. I am glad I stuck by the tenets of attachment parenting, pretty much the only parenting method supported by science and 30 years of peer-reviewed research.

The breastfeeding, co-sleeping (no cry-it-out), babywearing (no pram; sling or carrier only), and focus on positivity (no “you can’t do that”) and encouragement has been a breeze compared to others who complained about what a hassle it is to go out with so much to carry, disobedient kids. It is instant calm when Jack is nursing and his close bond to me has allowed him the security to be one of the most independent kids I know.

Attachment parenting builds a strong bond between mother and child, and equips a child with confidence, love, security, and a helluva lot of smarts.

First of all, no TV. All the studies agree it is harmful. It is common sense that a child spending one hour playing with his toys or running around in the park is learning more than a child passively watching TV, yes, even the “educational” programs. We, as humans, learn best by example, in the real world.

We choose our battles. By allowing him to win the small battles, such as choosing the clothes he’d like to wear, and what toys to play, he allows us to win the big ones, such as when it is time to go (we rarely have a problem with that, after giving him 5 minutes grace then he waves bye bye) and when it is bedtime.

Today he can readily say he is ready to sleep. With the former, he has grown confident of his choices and truly, he has great taste in clothes.

His artwork is all over our home, the prized ones hung in the bedroom. He loves drawing and we regard each piece as a work of art. Just in 3 months, his work has evolved so much. And he is very proud of it.

We negotiate now. I believe it is an important skill he needs in life. He wants to go out to the park. I say okay, after your meal. He thinks about it then looks at me and says ok. And we eat, then we go out. I keep all my promises to him and so does his dad.

Integrity is something so important and yet so overlooked. I was truly blessed to have a father who keeps his word to me every single time since the day I was born. If he says he will bring the newspaper, yes even something as trivial as that, he will. And he has never forgotten. That is how I learnt integrity.

And so I plan to teach it to Jack. For him to become the man I want him to be, I must become the person I want him to be.

Jack’s been progressing by leaps and bounds. His fave book is a stunning pictorial journey from Earth to the edge of the Cosmos called Universe which I’d bought in Kinokuniya (yes, I finally joined them as a member when I bought the Anazi Anazo books. He impressed my godparents two weeks ago by correctly identifying Earth, Sun, Mars, Io, Europa, Pluto, Charon, and Dark Matter (his faves).

To date, he can correctly and consistently identify Earth, Sun, Mercury, Mars, Europa, Io, Pluto, Charon, Dark Matter, Saturn, Jupiter, and Neptune. He must “read” (he says) the book every night before bed and loves pointing out the objects he knows and is keen to learn the nebulas. Tonight he enunciated Retina Nebula, Helix Nebula, Hourglass Nebula, Eta Carinae, Andromeda, and a few more I can’t remember now because it is past 4am - he remembers better than me.

He can id the letters U, N, I, V, E, R, S, and E on the cover. If he forgets, he’ll guess and flash me a huge grin. We laugh and clap enthusiastically whether or not it is correct. Although I’m sure he can see the pride and joy in my eyes when he does get it correct.

Aside from the Universe, he loves his cars. My Dad bought him all the Ferraris from Shell and the revving sound enthralled him for hours on end. I even managed to doze. He can id without fail Minis, Porsches, Mitsubishis, and BMWs. He can id a car (live or on a pic) from miles away. I am amazed sometimes. There’s a live-sized version of his fave black Porsche Cayman S parked at my sister’s house and we always pay it a visit to say hello.

He’s always buoyant and happy even when sick and has quickly learnt never to admit that he’s got a runny nose or else Dad and Mom will make him take medicine. When he doesn’t know something, he’ll take a guess. That might be because we always laugh together whether or not it is correct so he never fears being wrong.

People around me comment how happy he is, how wonderful it is that he sits with us through dinner, and how polite and friendly he is, saying hello, bye, kissing, hugging, and blowing kisses. Yet they also like to comment how clingy he is to me. That’s all part of the process of the peaceful positive attachment parenting philosophy I adopt.

In the wild, it is normal for children to stay close to their mothers, never to follow strangers as it would mean certain death. We and all other living species now have survived because we follow this code. When the children are taught by their mothers, held and feel secure, they are better equipped emotionally and mentally to cope and thrive and coexist with others in the outside world.

I’ve never regretted giving up my career for my son. Although one of the attachment parenting experts say that the rewards will be reaped when your child grows into a healthy, happy, well-adjusted and responsible adult, I think I am seeing the rewards every day I spend with Jack.

A lovely mention on Mike’s blog (and my mug of our poem The Nightmare Avatar’s Nightmare and my reading on the SFPA’s Halloween page. If you haven’t grabbed a copy of it yet, run run and buy the H.P. Lovecraft’s Magazine of Horror Issue #4 now.

I’m up to 4500 words on The Flame now, a speculative story I am writing. So far I hit 3000 on the first sitting - 6 hours - the ending was rather abrupt, says my kindly readers, so I revised it for expansion during another edit and sitting to 1500 words. As the plot is rather complex, I have had to lie down and poke holes in the plot. It troubles me when a story has glaring plot errors, never mind the factual errors, and I want to ensure I commit none of them.

Since it has been a zillion years since I have worked on a story this long - I got up to 30 pages once for a novel but that has been shelved after I got stuck and bored. The hard copy is still with me. Someday I might just take another look at it. At best it is another Interview with the Vampire, before I even read it. But that is another story.

Got a new mouse today. My fingers are getting friction burn from using the touchpad. And the true reason is I had spilled my honey green tea onto the keyboard causing some keys to stick together. Must Google to find solution. Speaking of which, bought a handful (literally) of Google shares. Glad I have made 5% already. Go Android!

Note: Just after I pressed Publish, the hubby signalled me that Jack woke up. He turned on the sidelight and true enough my little munchkin was sitting up rubbing his eyes. I walked to him, waving and said hey. To our delight, he waved back. It was the cutest thing!