An Extended Bedtime when there are 2
Attachment Parenting, Breastfeeding, Siblings, Sleep, Tandem Nursing Add commentsIt felt like I had much more time to myself before I had a second child. Wolf was bathed, we had plenty of time to read books together and he had time to play games by himself while his Dad and I chatted or he gave me a quick back rub (for carrying his son around all day).
Having a baby and toddler definitely takes more time and energy, especially at night. We must leave wherever we are by 8.30pm or the very latest, 9pm. I bathe Kitten while Daddy bathes Wolf, in that order. Then I dress both children, read a little to Wolf (not as much as before I regret), Kitten gets tummy time, and lights out at 10.30pm.
Kitten gets nursed to bed first, while Daddy reads to Wolf or lets him watch some animals on YouTube. Sometimes he comes in looking for me and I nurse him too. He crawls into a kneeling position while I nurse Kitten on my side or at a 45 degree angle facing Kitten. Or else, when Kitten falls asleep, which can take on average an hour, I call Wolf and he nurses to sleep too.
That can take another hour. So if I am lucky, I get off duty (although on call) by 11.30pm. On average, it is midnight. Really unlucky, 12.30pm or 1am because Kitten has woken up and needs to be nursed again or worse, wakes Wolf up too so repeat and rinse.
By which time I am famished and parched and need a snack, which I enjoy in front of the computer, in the same room as the kids so I can run to them if they call for me, which is relatively often or by 3-4am. Or in Wolf’s case, maybe 2am. But usually after my supper.
I wish I and other stay-home moms would not be berated for claiming some me-time at the expense of sleep. We are human too, and need to unwind. And with 2, there is even less time left in the night to claim.
Mephala is a strange and rather interesting 
August 29th, 2009 at 1:56 pm
Oh I hear you…
It seems like I’ve just gotten into some sort of routine with Gavin when our lives are going to be turned upside down again with the addition of a baby. Although we welcome our baby with open arms, I do feel apprehensive about what’s to happen to my “me time”.
I completely agree that most around me fail to understand why I should require “me time”. I often get berated for staying up late and very little sympathy if I claim fatigue because it’s my fault I stayed up late.
August 30th, 2009 at 2:29 am
Once the kids settle in a sleep routine, me-time will be back. Just with more interruptions.
I think the lack of sympathy is because of everyone’s misconception about stay-home parenting. They think we just laze around and do nothing while the kids take care of themselves.
What they don’t see is us giving undivided attention to the kids, feeding them, dressing them, bathing them, teaching them, reading to them, washing them, entertaining them… all of which takes 10x longer than if you were to do it for yourself because children dawdle. That’s what they do. Even going out takes ages!
Only another stay-home mom will empathise. You know it’s true!